There are steak houses and there are steak houses. Keens is part of the historic breed of chop shops that permeate New York's meat mecca. It’s been trading since 1885, so it should know a thing or two about steaks. And pipes, as it turns out, since Keens houses the largest collection of churchwarden pipes in the world.
Opening the door reveals a very dimly lit, but beautiful, mahogany dining room. The unmistakable smell of dry aged beef hits me. The roasty, toasty nuttiness of rendered dripping. Yankee Candle, take note, this is what you want your home to smell like.
We are sat in the middle dining table and it's nice to see a mix of business lunch, Instagrammers and couples occupying the tables orbiting us. It feels busy for a Monday - something I like to see. The waiter is extremely friendly, a mix of James Gandolfini and Joey Tribianni rolled into one; fast talking, no nonsense.
We order the Keens signature mutton and the porterhouse for two with roasted veg. Joey Gandolfini recommends a side of well done fries and 20 minutes later, we are greeted with two big plates of carnivorous delights. The beef being a porterhouse has two muscles, the sirloin and the fillet - both are cooked perfectly medium rare, with a hard sear of carbonised flesh on the outside. Some don’t like this as it imparts a slightly bitter flavour to the meat, but I actually enjoy eating it this way. The beef has good flavour from the aging, not the beefiest beef I’ve ever eaten but still delicious. A note on USDA bred beef is that it’s leaner than most Brits are used to, and as such lacks the mouth feel and, dare I say, taste that we are exposed to back home.
The mutton chop however is bursting with flavour and texture, and is a lovely eating experience. The meat from the loin is spoon tender whilst the crispy gnarled fat of the belly flap is tremendous. You can taste the gaminess in the lamb but it's not overpowering like some mutton can be. A homemade mint sauce and an au jus accompany the dish, both of which are delicious in their own right. The mint sauce has enough sweetness, yet still delivers a tang of minty freshness to cut all the rich fat.
Our server was right to recommend the fries. They are potato perfection in their golden, crunchy, salted jackets. The veg is a mixed bag - the roasted fennel is pretty good, just about cooked but the asparagus is a wilting stalk. Ultimately, though, who cares? You’re here to scoff meat.
All in all, Keens was a memorable trip. Not cheap, but worth the expense. Enjoy the sights and smells, and feast on some serious culinary history. Now bring me another mutton chop....
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